During the months after our miscarriage I didn't want to talk about it with more than a handful of people. It's so weird to think about all of the things we are doing this summer and imagining being pregnant. It still hurts badly but I can definitely talk about it now without feeling like I have an elephant sitting on my heart. Which led me to the topic of things that someone who just had a miscarriage doesn't want to here.
So I just wrote out all of the things not to say and I felt so bad about it. So I'm just going to write out what I think are good responses and some that I got. I realize that people just want to comfort you. They don't want to hurt your feelings. They just don't know what to say. And I think that's the point. There is nothing you can say. Absolutely nothing. Except I'm sorry that happened. Because the only thing that is going to make someone who had a miscarriage feel better is time. Time is what it took to talk about it. Time is what it took to feel like I could breathe. Time is what it took so I could see another pregnant woman and not feel jealous. And I'm not proud to admit that. But it is the truth.