Quote: No Idea Graphic: Me

Despite all of my attempts and goals this year (2014) it is hard not to think of life a year ago at this time. March 11th, 2013 was by far the hardest day of my life thus far in my 26 years. It's hard not to imagine the little one that could have joined our family or the loss that we are healing from constantly to this day. March 11th may forever be one of the worst days of the year for me and the day that I will always fill my plate with so much I can't stop to think about it.

While it's extremely easy to talk about and remember the ways last year around this time negatively affected us it's extremely hard to remember the ways in which we have been blessed. So I will take the last 20 minutes of this day to remind myself of some great things we have experienced since what we would consider a tragedy struck our family.

- We were able to spend last summer in DC/Baltimore
- Jord attended Johns Hopkins and we made some of the greatest memories/friendships
- We moved into a place that isn't very far from where we once lived but suits us so much better
- Almost done with didactic part of pharmacy school
- Great friendships both new and old
- Several exhibitions/freelance opportunities in photography for me
- Rely on each other more
- Made fitness more of a priority
- Spent time in Utah with family/friends
- Teaching some of my greatest students
- Sufficient for our needs
- New callings
- Becoming somewhat of a better cook
- New car when ours got flooded
- Traveled to several locations around the southeast
- Successful research project/presentations for Jord
- Several opportunities for pharmacy roles
- Celebrated my great-grandmother's 100th birthday
- Started shooting more film photos
- A schedule that allows more sleeping in

I'm sure there is so much more...

It's so easy to get caught up in what we do not have because we want a child so badly. I hope this list doesn't come across in a bragging way because I would gladly give up most of those experiences to have that baby in my arms. But it's so important to see how we have been taken care of despite how hard it has been to see these things while going through them.

I've had several friends who have asked me on occasion how to help someone else they know going through a miscarriage or similar loss. The only answer I have is time. Time has healed my heart. Time has healed my soul. I can remember at the beginning spending days in bed crying off and on and thinking there was no way I was ever going to get through this. I couldn't understand why we had to go through this. It wasn't until I started relying more on my faith to pull me through that I was given a confirmation that it would just take time. I can't express how grateful I am to finally be living that time. That time where even though I still don't have all the answers my heart is no longer hurting and I no longer weep at things I cannot control.

Currently, we feel good to be moving forward in faith. To stop trying to control everything and just rely on a bigger plan than ourselves. We feel good to just have time.

Please excuse the crappy little phone photo



For Valentine's Day I made Jord a little card with turtle's in turtlenecks. He absolutely loves turtles and he absolutely loved the card. I was so happy because I put a lot of thought and tlc into making it. The turtles were inspired by some adorable stuffed animals I saw recently. I wish I had the source but I don't. :/

I think this has given me the push to start working on some more of my illustrations just for fun. It's nice to kind of have a little outlet that I can work on without the stress of work and freelancing.


Over the past few weeks we have school/work/everything in Charleston closed down twice for multiple days. Why did this happen? Well the first time was for a tiny bit of ice with a tiny bit of snow. The second time? Rain. Yes. Rain.

Then again, why am I even complaining? While it did put my students severely behind project wise... it made it so Jord and I were stuck at home together and encouraged by all authorities to stay put. ;)

The photos below are around our neighborhood from the first shutdown. I tried, very unsuccessful, to get Jord to go for a ride into downtown Charleston or to the beach. I was dying to see the town in a ghostlike state but he just wasn't having it or even the least bit interested. (He thinks he would like to move back to a snow infested area... I beg to differ and I find that deep down extremely hard to believe. You should have seen him scraping the ice off of the windshield later in the day.) Also, please note the awesome pamper's box (sled) on the bench.



White it was a ton of fun to watch our southerners "sled" in garbage lids, boogie boards, etc... I must say it was interesting to once again experience "snow" in the south. Growing up in North Carolina I remember it usually snowed once a year/every other year and it paralyzed everything. I used to get so frustrated that we had to stick to our neighborhoods and everything was closed. It's too funny that I felt that way because I will gladly take it now. To all of our snow covered friends -- I hope this gave you a good laugh.

 




A few weeks back we celebrated our friend Chris' bday. For his birthday his wife planned the sweetest surprise pajama cereal party packed with the cutest party hats, taste testing, games, and more. I set up a photobooth and the wives got together and made some props. It was a ton of fun and a night well spent eating cereal and rocking pjs.



It was a blast and it was fun to come together to surprise Chris with all of our combined talents.


I can't help but think often about how lucky we are to have made the sweetest friends since we moved to Charleston and I feel like we are fortunate enough to add more couples to the list every year who are going through professional school just like we are. It's nice to have other women to talk to who understand how hard it is to stare at the back of your husband's head because his face is planted in some form of a medical textbook.

I will have to share soon the video of one of the games we played that night that required quite a bit of jumping. Jord had me rolling on the floor because he kept laughing/crying out about how much cereal he had and how he couldn't jump anymore.

But for now -- one more photo.


January was a busy weird month and for some reason I haven't been wanting to blog very much despite  having lots of blog posts swimming about in my head. I'm not sure why. But we'll just call this post: Some of January and a bit before in photos.


^^^ Christmas wasn't what we expected but looking back I can only remember the good stuff. ^^^ 
^^^ Once we returned home to Charleston we went to visit Angel Oak. ^^^ 

^^^ New Years was a blast with some of our closest friends and their adorable kids. 
We love those kids! ^^^ 




^^^ We have been spending a lot of time with our friends who will be leaving us this summer 
-- oh the fourth year life. 
One day we ended up at Sullivan's Island on a foggy day.
It was one of the most beautiful sights we have witnessed here in Charleston
and needless to say we have many, many plans to return. ^^^



Overall January was pretty good to us. 

Jord went back to school for his last semester before fourth year rotations. It feels pretty weird to be at this stage already. 2014 could be our last full year in Charleston. I'm feeling more than ever the need to soak up every little detail in case it is. Jord also received his monthly rotation assignments and boy does he have a fourth year ahead of him.  I can tell he is excited though! 

As for me, I started back to teaching in the middle of the month and boy do I have an intriguing group of students this semester. I'm excited to see them continue to develop and find out what they are all about. I'm also shooting more film than ever -- it was one of my goals for 2014 -- and I'm loving it. I'm also opening up my print shop starting tomorrow and I'm super excited to get back in the swing of things with that. 

A few things to look forward to: 
A Cereal Birthday Bash and The first snow I've ever seen in South Carolina.